nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
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