There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
This is my gift to your gina
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
