I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
