it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
i feel like the 7 eleven by your house knows our deepest, darkest secrets
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I'm so happy I'm only on my second drink. That would have been the best idea ever if I was on my fifth.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
are you still alive?
no.
i'll cry at your funeral. and leave a burrito by your tombstone
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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