Apparently you make a good broom.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize