he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
My ass is underappreciated
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize
