I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
He pulled out, and the resulting cumstain on my sheets is in the shape of a fetus. The irony of this is both awesome and terrifying.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
