Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
