Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Make sure your heart doesn't explode. These are words of wisdom.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
In the middle of me riding him, he stopped me and said "You're the kind of person who would be restrained for being obnoxiously drunk on an airplane, huh?"
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
Randomize
