I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
"auto-tuned camel" is how i'd describe the noises she made
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
