What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
threw up in the library. i should be embarrassed, but i'm willing to bet that i'm one of the first so i'm kinda proud.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
