Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Randomize
