I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize