I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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