On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
