I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
The air was thick with penises
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
Randomize
