ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
