nutella sex= disaster
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
I made you bacon and gave you a blow job. I'd say you had a pretty great day.
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize