on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
My mom just told me she would flash her tits to a cop to get me out of jail, and then we high-fived.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
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