North Korea, Best Korea!
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Randomize
