I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
I know I'm drunk but why am I receiving this handjob through the pant leg of my shorts..?
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
