I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
