i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
