Hey guys thanks for lettin me crash at your place for the weekend, I had a great time. PS I got three quarters of a hand job from an asian on the dance floor last night. True story.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I decided to have a date tonight. Back on horse I go. Or aiming to be on a horse cock one day. You know. However that metaphor goes.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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