You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Legitimately semi-blackout across the table from the governor off a chardonnay i can't even pronounce.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
