Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
I couldn't read the menu. I ordered the first thing I was able to read. Don't think I ate anything. Left $20 on the table.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
