she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
Randomize
