i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Uhh... I think I meant "Be proud, I'm taking shots before my public speaking test." "Coffee and vodka is not good" and "Also, I'm giving blood drunk."
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
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