We're facebook friends in real life
Who wears a wallet chain?!
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
