why didn't you poke me back
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
at the hospital. he locked himself in the kitchen, said he was making beer batter shrimp. don't know if it's the mercury poisoning, alcohol poisoning or second degree burns they're holding him for, but i've got a pretty guess.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
We can't shop at Hobby Lobby anymore. They don't like Plan B which basically runs through our veins.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
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