I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Pooping to opera.
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