the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Sooo does anyone wanna tell me why I threw up a cigarette this morning?
OMG YOU DID TO?!
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
