I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Come downstairs. Moms serving wine for breakfast again.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
I feel like we should actually go to church one of these days to thank god for saving us from herpes and babies.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Randomize
