I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
