I would really like to get high with Bill Nye. I'm being dead serious. Every step I take is literally a step I take because it will take me closer to Science Guy high.
We could get him to build Inspector Gadget.
I didn't know you were high TOOOO!!!
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
And anyway at least being paid in opium makes a cool story
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
