I can't watch pbs sober anymore
where does the pee come out of this thing
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
