we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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