Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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