I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
When we became besties with benefits we agreed I could still get dick
I didn't think I'd have to specify "not my Dad"
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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