And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
i want to swaddle you in tequila
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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