Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
TONGUES ARE JUST MEAT TENTACLES IN OUR MOUTHS OMG
HOW ABOUT I DON'T WAKE UP TO THESE TYPES OF TEXTS
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
on a campus of 30,000 people, i should not be able to see every single guy I've ever hooked up with at one party.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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