Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Just an fyi, you also tried to wrangle a peacock last night.
Randomize
