She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
Thanks for having 911 ready when I jumped off the balcony
My ex just called and told me that he is on his way to the hospital because he popped a vein in his dick. Should I go to the ER with him or class?
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize