you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
