I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
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