Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Note left in log book: "4:30am a guy was caught masturbating in the bathroom and passed out in his own juices and we had to take the door off the hinges."
You guys are open that late?
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
Randomize
