So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Moan for me like Helen Keller
I want to fuck you on the side of the bed tonight.
babe, don't say it like that!
I'm sorry, I want to penetrate you on the edge of our sleeping quarters this evening.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
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