yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Is that a tongue signal to get over there? That's how my two heads are taking it.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize
