Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Randomize
