Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
