Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
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